My dad and I were in a hotel and he tried the coffee and smiled and said “ahh, it’s like making love in a canoe.” and I said, “it’s that good?” and he stopped smiling and looked me in the eye and said, “no, it’s fucking close to water" before pouring it down the drain really dramatically and walking away.
why can’t periods just last for like an hour, like okay you’ve made your point, I’m not pregnant you can leave now
yo could you keep it down some of us are trying to work here
in a minute
My buddy’s office ordered a bulk bag of Easter Eggs. It took him a minute of laughing to realize they DIDN’T get the wrong shipment.
oh my god.
Applying for jobs is starting to feel a lot like
you dont just play the sims. you go on a sims binge for three days straight then put the game down for 5 months
sorry sir, we don’t have the facilities for a cat scan, but we can certainly get you a lab report
Marvel Cinematic Universe Phase II